Phraxos

In self-awareness there is no need for confession, for self-awareness creates the mirror
in which all things are reflected without distortion. Every thought-feeling is thrown, as
it were, on the screen of awareness to be observed, studied and understood; but this flow
of understanding is blocked when there is condemnation or acceptance, judgment or
identification. The more the screen is watched and understood—not as a duty or enforced
practice, but because pain and sorrow have created the insatiable interest that brings its
own discipline—the greater the intensity of awareness, and this in turn brings heightened
understanding.

...You can follow a thing if it moves slowly; a rapid machine must be made to slow down if
one is to study its movements. Similarly, thoughts-feelings can be studied and understood
only if the mind is capable of proceeding slowly; but once it has awakened this capacity,
it can move at a high velocity, which makes it extremely calm. When revolving at high
speed the several blades of a fan appear to be a solid sheet of metal. Our difficulty is
to make the mind revolve slowly so that each thought-feeling can be followed and
understood. What is deeply and thoroughly understood will not repeat itself.

The Book of Life - June 21

"New York 1928-29
 
Daly King and I often spoke together about how certain things in the
group were going. We had the impression that in some way all of us
were wrong in the way we were doing self-observation. We finally
decided to ask Mr. Gurdjieff himself about this.
 
One night Daly and I went to the apartment for a meeting and saw as
soon as we walked into the room that we were the first to arrive. As
we came in, Mr. Gurdjieff was on his way to the kitchen. I whispered
to Daly, 'We'll never have another chance like this again.' He nodded.
 
I stopped in the kitchen doorway and said, 'Mr. Gurdjieff, Mr. King and
I wish to ask you, please, a question about self-observation.'
 
Mr. Gurdjieff looked at me but said nothing. Nor did he nod his head or
indicate in any way that I should speak further.
 
But I did, because in some subtle way I felt that he was waiting to hear
more. 'We feel that there may be something wrong in the way we are doing
self-observation. Are we wrong, Mr. Gurdjieff?'
 
"Never you do self-observation,' he said forcefully. 'You do mind observation.
Mind observation you do. Can even make psychopath.'"

"Q. Mr. Gurdjieff what are you trying to do?
 
A. What I try to do? I try to make human beings."

The object of self-observation is neither analysis nor comparison, but simply, without a bunch of *useless mental circumlocutions*, RECORDING (as would a video camera) a given happening in your life (of course including *yourself* in the observation). Much LATER perhaps, when you have thousands of these "videos" stored up, you can start to "analyze" them. But to analyze things as they happen or soon afterward drains them of their meaning possible impact.